*To my dismay and your amusement, my August 2008 Twilight Series rant - Breaking Dawn Part II*
*Enjoy!*
(continued from BDR-I, see below)
[WARNING! This is a rant, not a proper book review. My English teacher would bite my head off if she were to read this]
Alice.
WHY?!
WHYYYY??!! Whatever happened to her past? To her misterious creator who
bit her to save her from a vengeful vampire? What happened to the
object of desire-ahem, POWER desire- of the leader of the Volturi Coven,
the fiercest Coven of our time? Oh, she had some errands to run. But
yeah, she made it in time and saved the day. Because, she DID save the
day, you know? Has anyone noticed? Sure, Edward says the Volturi were
looking for an excuse to get out of battle (because they were PETRIFIED
by Bella's shield) but did anyone even noticed that it was Alice who
actually stopped the fight from happening? Oh, maybe Esme did, but who
cares about Esme? [I do!]
We'll never know what actually happened
between James and that vampire. We know all of the Cullen's stories,
except for her. It's outrageous but it makes me feel a bit better to
know that at least she and Jasper are different. They have so much
potential... something I truly believe is that the Volturi wanted Alice
to join them so badly.
The Battle.
At page 540, when AT
LAST the action, the plot, the conflict of the book starts, I was again
hoping it would all be worth it (once again, thanks to Alice) The next
something-hundred pages are all about getting ready for the big battle.
The greatest vampire gathering in history to face the terrible Volturi.
The battle was to be legendary... if only there had been a battle at
all.
Ok, kids, I understand that the author is not fond of
violence and is a really religious person, got it. But it sucks
[author-wise] that she built all that anticipation for something that
doesn't happen in the end. It all went back to where it started: the
Volturi might come down here some day and they might kill
us all then... just, not today. Maybe that will happen in another book.
Or in a couple more books. Or maybe in a whole new series of books. Or
maybe never at all.
Who knows?
*sigh*
Well, thing
is, I'm disappointed (as I'm sure you've noticed). The first book was
silly and, well, bad. Just plain bad. But it was entertaining.
The second and third were waaaaaaaay better, cause they actually had
plots and conflicts and it was not all about the FOREVER-AND-EVER love
relationship. Yes, they did have their AWFUL flaws, but it was getting better.
So
there I was, silly me, hoping the fourth book was going to be
better. Hoping the author was gonna show just how much her skill had
developed. But no. It was all back to a silly fanfic story. 540 pages of
drama that could have easily been avoided-even without abortion. I do not support abortion,
but I would have been a bit disturbed about having an unknown, undead
spawn growing inside of me. And killing me as it did. Post-540-pages of
drama, we see a faint light. A plot? We could only hope...
And
then hope was crushed by the weight of happily-ever-after in the form of
a big fat ugly lady. No battles. No struggle. No pain, no game. And
nobody dies, of course, how could ANYONE die... they're all undead,
arent't they?
...
I hadn't read any other reviews (not
that this is one, this is a RANT) til JUST now. But it seems I'm not the
only one disappointed (although I already knew that Lucia and Denise
were with me-LUCIAAA!!!)
I think book returning is one of the
worst things you can do to an author. Like burning it or destroying it
in public. I know I said I wanted to chew some pages off or throw the
copy out the window... but please understand that I had just been dumped
by a werewolf =P
No, but honestly, the book was a big let down.
Just when it was starting to get better...
CRASH!
It all went back to fanfic story.
I
hope you're happy now, Jake *sniff* Just pray that Billy is right and
you've chosen the best girl to procreate (HAVE SEX! YES SEX!) with.
Cause if not, well, you'll be having a hard time to get a half-vampire
pregnant once she reaches "adulthood".
Who knows?
P.S: By the way, didn't vampires reek? Weren't they supossed to be your enemies, the very reason why you even SHIFTED?